Sunday, April 4, 2010

More Seders Please!

Did you ever wonder why we still need to observe Passover beyond the Seders? What purpose does it serve? None I guess, unless we want to have more Seders. And yes, that's my suggestion. Have more Seders.

Now the concept might sound silly. One Seder is enough. Two is more than enough. Why would anyone want more?

Well, the more I think about it, the more I'm coming to the conclusion that more Seders actually is a good and beneficial thing for the Jewish community and faith.

Let me tell you why.

So that we continue observing the holiday. Just because there are no more Seders doesn't mean that we stop observing the holiday after the Seders are done.

In other words, don't think that Passover is "over" when the Seders are done, and its goodbye until the next big event. Rosh Hashanah!

Jews are drawn to the Seder, the primary observance of Passover. Jews gather for Seders with family and community in numbers that are quite remarkable. According to recent studies, seventy five percent of Jews have some sort of Seder, even if it's only a family dinner that they call a Seder. The Seder is the most observed Jewish ritual, followed by the lighting of Hanukkah candles.

But in this age of individualism, for one or two nights anyway, we all become part of a community. We forget about our individual needs and focus on our families, friends and community.

We celebrate this holiday together. While plenty of Jews stay home by themselves on the High Holidays, on Passover, they at least invite others into their homes and they observe and dine together.

In other words, the single commandment instructing every generation of Jews to tell the story of redemption from Egypt brings Jews together. Even if only for a night or two, we move away from our aloneness into an encounter with one another and our tradition at our Seder tables.

The great sage Hillel had a saying in Pirkei Avot. He said "do not separate yourself from the community." And you know what, perhaps he had Passover in mind when he said it.

Why do I say this? Because what happens after the Seders are over? We go back to our lives as individuals. We separate ourselves from the family and friends and communities that we were just a part of.

It is better to be alone. It is easier to live alone. This way I can make or break all the rules that I want.

But the fact that Passover is a weeklong celebration culminating with a seventh day holiday comes to teach us that the community feeling that we enjoyed that first and second night should not be extinguished just because there is no formal Seder the rest of the week.

Every night during the Passover holiday can be an occasion for a Seder. It doesn't need to be the Seder of the Haggadah. It doesn't need to be the Seder of the four cups of wine, and afikomen, and bitter herbs. Or even a huge meal! But it is, and can be, a Seder of family, of friends, and of community.

It can, and must, be another opportunity to get together with fellow Jews over leftovers (and let's face it, who doesn't have leftovers after the Seder) to maybe talk about how your particular Seders went, or to talk about any other topic of interest.

In fact, believe it or not, a few years ago I actually had a seventh night Seder. We drank four cups of water because tradition says that on the seventh day of Passover is when the Israelites crossed the Red Sea.

So talk about the crossing of the Red Sea. Talk about Miriam's cup. Talk about current events. Talk about Israel. Talk about Judaism. Talk about any of the topics that you couldn't get to on the first two nights because of time constraints. Or talk about anything that is on your minds. But at least get together and talk.

Because however you slice it, however you want to handle it, the seven days of Passover present us with the opportunity, since we can't go anywhere else, to reconnect with our family, friends, and community.

The Seder teaches us many lessons. And these lessons should not only be remembered and acted upon only once or twice each year.

We read 'ha lachma anya." Let all who are hungry come and eat. Shouldn't we adhere to this all year round by inviting people, whether they be friends or strangers, to come and dine with us?

We read the four questions. We read "you shall teach your children." Can't we do that all year round? Can't we gather at any time during the year and ask questions about why we as Jews observe Shabbos? Can't we gather every week over a Shabbos dinner for example, and engage in a Shabbat Seder, a discussion about what Shabbos means? We can do it on Shabbat. We can do it anytime. We can do it with family and friends. We can do it with strangers. We can share it with our community.

We don't have to limit the joy of the Seder experience to only one or two nights each year. We can do it this whole week. We can do it anytime during the year.

Passover is a weeklong holiday to remind us that what we experienced doesn't end after the Seders and it doesn't even end after Yizkor. So in the remaining days of this holiday, let us make an effort to continue the good feelings that we had those first two nights.

Let the memories of those Seders influence us for not only the rest of the week, but for the rest of the year as well. Not as a burden. But as a sign of joy and celebration, and family, friends and community.